Me and my hubby are contemplating on moving to Pennslyvania, very soon. The problem is that my girls have their grandparents here, their school is here, pretty much everything they know and love is.......here. Do we know as parents whats best for them just because we are their parents? How does that work?
My hubby has an opportunity for employement up there, first of all, and second of all, we have family in PA. My father was born and raised in PA, so we are not moving blind. But sometimes it feels like we will be. But I cannot stay in VA for anybody else, and that includes my mom, dad, a school, a friend, etc etc etc.
My mother just got home, and she is stable and I feel like a move like this could send her back into ICU, but is that guilt making me feel like this or is it really second guessin the actual move? Dont know................
I am a little peaved at my hubby because I mentioned moving over a year ago and he wanted no part in it. Now all of a sudden, he wants to move. What if I dont want to go? I do, but part of me is being spiteful I think. That he thinks that I will just say "how high" when he says "jump", ya know? But I know deep down, its not like that at all. It has alot to do with our marriage for one, my mothers illness over the years (it has taken its toll) and lastly but most importantly, Jaxon's death.
No matter what we do, it will change us. If we stay here, he will be unhappy. If we go, our family will be unhappy. Who wins????
I have several thoughts.
ReplyDelete#1 It is really hard to parent without help of grandparents. We did it for 2 years and moved here so we would be near grandparents. Think of all of your nights you've had to yourselves while the kids were with grandparents. Those would be gone. Babysitting is expensive, and honestly it's hard enough for me to trust anyone enough to leave to the boys with, I would imagine with you guys having lost Jaxon, it will be even harder. Not to mention it is expensive.
#2 Are you running away from your problems? I promise they will follow you.
#3 If moving would give you financial security, you might just have to do it. Times are tough. :(
Unfortunatley amber, we dont get help now as it is. My mom is sick now so no babysitting there. His mom, well we barely see her. Acutally, more babysitting there because my aunt and uncle are retired and my cousin (jaxons godmother) is disabled so she is home everyday, Ive got two more aunts who work part time, and two more cousins. So actually, the time away, is better there, I hate to say it. :(
ReplyDelete#2- Maybe so, I brought that up to jon the other day that I was worried about it.
#3-Finances would be better, I am sure of it. Times are tough, look what you are going thru, or about to go thru?
thank u for the advice sweetie. Love ya!!!!!!!!!